


Broken Open

by RickylSammich



Series: A Rickyl In Time [1]
Category: Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Daryl's a dirty pig bottom, Eventual Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Internal Conflict, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, My First Fanfic, Prison Sex, Rickyl
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-02
Updated: 2014-06-06
Packaged: 2018-01-21 16:05:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1556180
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RickylSammich/pseuds/RickylSammich
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rick had accepted his feelings for Daryl and was pretty sure Daryl had the same feelings. But Daryl is a hothead and how on earth will Rick ever get Daryl to open up without inciting his rage?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Spoon

**Author's Note:**

> My first fanfic ever so be kind. I accept constructive criticism though. more notes at the end of this chapter.
> 
> Oh yeah...this takes place between seasons 3 and 4.

Rick woke up on the sofa he had been sleeping on. It took a minute for his eyes to adjust to the moon light from the high window of the abandoned shack he and Daryl had chosen as a good hideout for the night after their run for supplies had gone wrong.

The runs for supplies had become increasingly difficult and they had to now travel further and further from the prison on these runs. This time they had went further than ever before and had found very little before they had needed to turn back or risk running out of gas before getting back to the prison. The gas canisters in the trunk would barely be enough to get them back to the prison as it was and they hadn't found any vehicles on the way with gas to siphon from. The only bit of luck they had encountered on the run was finding the abandoned shack on the way back as daylight was running out.

They had planned on being back at the prison that night but as the runs got further out they had warned everyone at the prison that there was a chance that they wouldn't make it back that day so hopefully nobody was too worried. 

Rick looked over at Daryl sleeping on the mattress on the ground. Daryl was sleeping on his side with his back turned to Rick. Rick had long ago came to terms with his feelings for Daryl. It had never felt wrong to Rick to be attracted to men and while he had never been with another man sexually he had been fully aware of his equal interests in both sexes since his teen years. Marrying Lori so young and being monogamous had meant he had never had a chance to be with another guy. 

The part Rick had initially found difficult was that the guy he had feelings for was Daryl. The feelings had been there before when Lori was still alive and they were easier to dismiss then because even though he and Lori had grown apart she was still his wife and he had sworn vows to her. Lori's death had rocked him to his core and after the grieving had leveled off and Rick had joined the ranks of sanity again his feelings for Daryl came to the forefront and were perplexing. 

Why did Rick have feelings for Daryl Dixon? Sure he was attractive and had proven his loyalty to the group and Rick had grown to respect the hell out of him but Daryl was a volatile hothead who was incredibly hard to communicate about anything with. Of all the people to possibly fall for since the world went to shit Rick figured it was his luck to fall for the biggest closed mouth son of a bitch who ever existed. What made things worse was the fact that Rick had long sensed his feelings were not one-sided. There were the times that Daryl had shunned the company of everyone else and yet if Rick had been on watch that night in the guard tower Daryl came up and sat with him and did his best to engage in conversation. But mostly those times they just sat in silence for the most part and Rick got the feeling that Daryl had just wanted Rick's company. There were other times Rick had caught Daryl looking at him and right when Rick looked back Daryl had diverted his eyes and instantly became more socially awkward then he was to begin with.

There had been no such moments shared between Rick and Daryl on this current run. It had been disheartening experience for both of them and Rick was glad it was almost over and to get back to the prison. Rick hadn't yet worked up the courage to make his move on Daryl. Sure the possibility of Daryl giving Rick a black eye was there but Rick wasn't scared of that. It was more for fear of Daryl blowing things out of proportion to where it effected the entire group. Who knows what Daryl would do? He might run off and take his chances on his own like he briefly had when his piece of shit brother Merle had come back into the picture. It had just been better to not rock the boat.

Looking at Daryl all of a sudden there was movement other then the regular sleeping breath movements. Rick saw Daryl's body lightly convulse all of a sudden. Then again with larger movements. Rick was just about to get up and check on Daryl when he heard some soft stifled hisses of air from Daryl and realized what was going on. Daryl was crying.

Daryl Dixon cried? He had emotions other than stoic or anger? Rick had come to the conclusion that wasn't possible even though deep down he knew Daryl was just as sensitive as everyone else. Even after Daryl had found Merle turned and disposed of him when Daryl showed back up to the prison hours later he hadn't cried or even showed signs of hurt about it. Of course the group had tried to show comfort to him but Daryl shrugged off talking about it and everyone was too scared of his volatility to push things further.

Rick just watched and listened at first to Daryl's stifled sobs because he had no idea what to do. Sexual attraction aside he wanted to comfort Daryl right now because it was obvious he was hurting and this was the most genuine emotion Rick had ever seen out of Daryl other than anger. How to do so without giving rise to Daryl's damn temper was the issue.

After what felt like five minutes of watching and barely hearing Daryl cry Rick decided to take action. He purposely made a light groaning noise of someone waking up out of a deep slumber. Daryl's movements and sounds instantly went still like Rick thought would happen. Daryl Dixon was completely unpredictable in that you never quite knew how he would react in certain situations but he was also very predictable in others. Showing emotions other than anger was not something Daryl did.

Rick got up from the sofa and went to the back of the shack and took a water bottle out of one of the bags they had brought in and drank it greedily. He had been parched when he woke up but hadn't even noticed as his mind had instantly wandered. Rick then went and grabbed the pillow he had been using on the couch and set in down on the side of mattress next to Daryl. Daryl didn't move and Rick took that as a good sign. Rick lifted up the covers and started to climb in and Daryl turned around.

"What are you doing?" Daryl asked. There wasn't any anger in his voice and it was a fair question.

"The couch smells like cat piss." Rick answered. 

The whole entire shack smelled like cat piss but Rick hoped Daryl took the answer as acceptable anyway.

Daryl groaned "Fine, I'll sleep there and you can take the damn mattress."

Well it was time for something Rick thought.

"Can we just both sleep here Daryl? To be honest it's not just the smell but I'm lonely and it would just feel better being next to someone."

"Pfft! Whatever." Daryl scoffed as he shot Rick a nasty look and then rolled over back to his original position with his back facing Rick without saying another world.

Well that's a start Rick thought to himself as he finished climbing into the covers. He laid on his back looking up at the ceiling contemplating his next move.

After what felt like an eternity but had probably only been three minutes Rick casually moved his hand over to the small of Daryl's back. Instantly there was a sharp but quiet gasp from Daryl and Rick could feel Daryl tense physically from the back of his hand but Daryl never said anything and gradually he was breathing evenly again and didn't feel as tensed. Rick then worked up the courage and rolled over and wrapped his arm around Daryl and spooned up against him and this time Daryl really tensed up and let out a grunt of distress but he never said anything at all which made Rick feel comfortable enough to pull in tight. 

Soon enough Rick felt Daryl's breathing even out again and then he could feel that Daryl was sleeping. Was that a success? He had wondered that to himself until the comfort he now felt himself enveloped him and he drifted off.

Rick woke up to bright sunlight and the sound of Daryl pulling the nailed board off of the door of the shack that they had used to secure it for the night. It was time to go home.

On the way back to the prison Rick now felt like Daryl Dixon himself. He felt he didn't know how to talk to Daryl after their spooning. Rick was glad that Daryl was driving this time because it allowed Rick to be able to think. 

They were close to being home now and if Rick was going to talk to Daryl about last night it had to be now.

"Daryl. Thanks for letting me snuggle up with you last night." was what Rick decided was innocent enough without being accusatory. He had definitely not wanted Daryl to know that he had heard him crying.

Daryl didn't respond right away and just stared at the road ahead with the prison now coming into view. Carl and Michonne were already at the gates waiting for them.

"Yeah." was all Daryl was finally able to muster and then he started biting his thumbnail as the car passed through the gates.

Rick supposed that had been some progress as they came to a stop and both got out of the car.


	2. Trust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I finished this chapter much sooner then anticipated. Hope you enjoy it.

Rick was on night watch in the guard tower. He noticed less walkers piled up against the prison fencing than usual which was a welcome relief. He had felt miserable ever since his run for supplies two weeks earlier had been unsuccessful. Michonne, Glenn, and Maggie had a far more successful run in the opposite direction the week after but that hadn't lifted Rick's spirits. He had been happy for the plentiful supplies to be sure but he felt he had somehow let the entire group down by going in the wrong direction in the first place.

Making matters much worse was Daryl. Daryl had barely spoken to Rick since the supply run and Rick cuddling with him. Daryl was a man of few words but this was different. There had been no Daryl sitting down next to him during meals and no visits to him when he was on night watch. Rick knew he had to do something to reach out to Daryl but he was was at a complete loss of what to do specifically. 

Rick heard footsteps walking up the guard tower and secretly hopes it's Daryl but he already knows it's Michonne coming to take over the night watch. She walked in without saying a word and sat down next to him.

"Guess it's that time." Rick said getting up to leave.

"No. Get your ass back here. We need to have a little talk first" Michonne said while gesturing for Rick to come back.

Great Rick thought as he returned to his seat. What had Carl done now? Michonne had become a Mother-type figure to Carl recently which Rick knew was good both for Carl and for Michonne. 

"You need to get over it." Michonne said pointedly. "So what if you and Daryl went the wrong way? How were either of you supposed to know which way would be best? I trust you to lead Rick. We all do. I don't expect you to be a damn psychic. The way you and Daryl have been acting since you got back isn't helping anyone's spirits so you both need to stop."

Well at least Carl hadn't done something bad Rick thought.

"I guess I didn't realize it was so obvious that it bothered me." Rick said after a short contemplation of Michonne's words. 

"Well it is." she said. "And you need to talk to Daryl. He basically only talks to you and Carol and now he's avoiding everyone all together and we all see it."

Fuck! This meant that Rick was going to have to force the issue with Daryl no matter how much he wanted to avoid it for the time being because he had no clue what to do.

"Thank's for the reassurance Michonne. I know I need to get over the bad run and I think your kind words will help with that." Rick said and got up again to leave.

"And you're going to talk to Daryl about it won't you?" She asked.

"I'll do my best." was all that Rick could bring himself to say as he started down the stairs of the guard tower.

Rick had instantly felt better about the bad run. Michonne was right...He wasn't a fucking psychic. He did need to get over it. The Daryl part of the conversation had filled him with dread though. He was going to have to find a way to placate Daryl for the good of the group.

Rick had longed to tell Michonne everything that had happened between him and Daryl and how he felt about Daryl but he couldn't. Rick wasn't at all ashamed to tell people but he knew Daryl would be and Rick is the one who made the move not Daryl so Rick thought to tell others about what happened wouldn't be right.

The next morning Rick was out weeding in the garden. The garden had become his escape. It allowed him to be useful without having to be in charge all the time. Working the garden gave him a chance to be alone while being able to reflect on other matters. Today his mind was completely on how to deal with Daryl. 

"You want some help Dad?" 

Rick turned and saw Carl with a bucket of water. This was something new. Carl hated any kind of chore that didn't involve him playing grown-up with a gun or doing something dangerous. Carl had some chores required of him but working the garden had not been one of them.

"Sure!" Rick said. "You feeling okay?"

"Michonne said I should start helping out more with stupid stuff like the garden." Carl replied.

Well that just fucking figured. Rick had been telling Carl to help out more with everyday tasks and less with serious tasks for awhile now and his words had always fell on deaf ears and now Michonne talks to Carl and of course Carl listens. He couldn't resent Michonne for it because at least Carl was listening to someone. He just resented the fact that Carl wouldn't listen to him directly anymore.

"Michonne said she talked to you last night about the bad run. You feeling any better yet?" Carl inquired as he slowly poured out the bucket of water along the long line of tomato plants.

"So Michonne just runs and tells you about our private conversations right after we have them eh?" Rick replied starting to feel slightly annoyed with Michonne.

"It's not like that!" Carl exclaimed with a frustration to his voice. "I asked her to talk to you about the run and Daryl in the first place because it's getting harder to talk to you myself. You still look at me like a damn kid when I'm not. Sometimes you trust me with a gun and other times you don't but you never trust me to be included in adult conversations!"

Rick thought about that for a second. Carl was partially right. Maybe he did deserve his gun back.

"Alright Carl. You can have your gun back." 

"It's not about the fucking gun!" Carl yelled as he dropped the bucket. "Don't you get it? I'm tired of you talking to me like I'm a little kid! I wouldn't have had to talk to Michonne if you had talked to me."

Rick pinched the bridge of his nose already feeling a headache coming on. He couldn't believe Carl had just sworn at him even though his son did have a point.

"Alright then." was all Rick could reply with.

"Well okay then." Carl smiled. "Let's try this again. You feeling any better about the bad run yet?"

"Yes." Rick replied doing his best not to sound annoyed.

"You talked to Daryl yet?" Carl asked.

"No." Rick responded not liking where the conversation was headed.

"Why not?" Carl asked.

"Because it's complicated." Rick responded.

"Complicated how?" Carl pressed.

"It just is. You wouldn't understand." Rick said.

"There you go again! This is why I can't talk to you! Don't you get it?" Carl said angrily.

Well this was just fucking wonderful Rick thought to himself. Did Carl really want to press the issue and be talked to like an adult? Rick was about to find out.

"Alright." Rick said calmly. "I'm attracted to Daryl and on the bad run I cuddled with him and now things are weird between us."

"What?" Carl had finally softly muttered after what felt like an eternity. "You're gay now?"

Rick and Lori had raised Carl to respect different cultures, races, and people with different sexual preferences and identities but still Rick wasn't sure how Carl was going to take this considering it was his father.

"No." Rick said. "I have always been attracted to both girls and guys. I loved your Mother very much."

"So you're bi then?" Carl asked.

"I guess I am." Rick replied thinking he had never really liked the word bi or bisexual. Rick was just Rick no matter who he was attracted to but he supposed Carl was right. "You okay with that?" Rick asked.

"I guess so." Carl replied after a short pause. "Just kinda surprising is all. But you deserve to have someone too just like after we thought you died Mom had Sha..." Carl trailed off.

"You knew about that?" Rick asked.

"Everyone knew about it." Carl said rolling his eyes. "Just no one wanted to talk about it."

There was a long pause while they both gathered their thoughts.

"Dad do you think Judith is yours?" Carl finally asked breaking the silence.

"Well she is your sister for sure so I think that means I'm her Dad no matter what." Rick replied. "What do you think Carl?" 

"I guess I agree." Carl said after some contemplation. "So why is it weird between you and Daryl now? He's gay you know."

"Oh yeah?" Rick responded raising an eyebrow.

"Well okay maybe he is bi like you..." Carl said making quotation marks with his fingers when he said the word bi. "but either way he is gay for you." again making quotation marks with the word gay.

Rick laughed. This was a truly bizarre conversation he was having with his son but it was good at the same time because Rick had felt the distance between him and Carl growing for quite some time and now he felt them coming back together again.

"And...you know this how?" Rick asked making quotation marks with his fingers at the word how.

"Because he follows you around like a lost puppy dog trying to please you and get you to adopt him." Carl said. "Well at least he used to. Maybe he's scared you don't like him anymore. It's not like you're going out of your way to talk to him either."

Rick supposed that was true but he hadn't wanted Daryl to blow up.

"I'm going to talk to him tonight. Carl I need you to keep this all to yourself. Don't want to have Daryl having a meltdown if the whole group finds out." Rick said. 

"Okay. I understand." Carl replied and then smiled.

"Dad did you mean what you said about me getting to have my gun back?"

"Yeah." Rick chuckled to himself.

After dinner that evening Rick was walking the fences doing a perimeter check as the light was fading when he heard footsteps behind him. He turned around as saw Carol smiling and he stopped to let her catch up.

"I'm still taking Judith overnight. Beth has her right now." she announced as they started walking again. "I wanted to talk to you about Daryl."

Of course you do Rick thought. "Okay."

"Things have been weird since you both got back from that run. Did something happen between you?" She asked rather bluntly.

"What do you mean exactly Carol?" Rick asked.

"Look I'm not stupid. I figured out a long time ago that Daryl didn't share the feelings I had for him. I know you are more of his type." She said with a shrug. "I just...if he did something inappropriate on the run like try to kiss you then I'm going to need you to forgive him. He's a good guy Rick and he is just lonely. I see it in his eyes. Whatever happened he's clearly ashamed and he isn't even talking to me anymore and that's killing me."

"It wasn't him." Rick said after a short contemplation. "I put my arm around him and cuddled with him that night."

"Really?" Carol replied as her eyes lit up a little.

"I've had feelings for him for awhile now. It's just that after the run I've been scared to talk to him because he hasn't been talking to me. Scared he is going to blow up but I'm going to talk tonight." Rick said.

"Yeah there is always that chance of him going off like a bomb." Carol agreed. "But even if he does explode he isn't going to go anywhere if you tell him to stay and get over it. Just talk to him Rick. Tell him how you feel. I trust it will all work itself out in the end."

"I will Carol. Thanks." Rick said as he saw Daryl from the corner of eye heading up to the guard tower for his night watch shift.

"Sure thing." Carol said as she gave Rick a hug. "I hope it works out between you guys. I just want Daryl to have a chance at being somewhat happy...even in this world we now live in."

Rick headed over to the guard tower. Fuck! How was he going to do this? He had to do this. There wasn't anymore avoidance. He had to trust his instincts. Trust. TRUST! That was it! Rick knew Daryl trusted him as much as he could trust anybody but that wasn't enough. Daryl needed to trust that Rick did really want him and trust that it was going to be okay if they went further.

Rick finished climbing the stairs to the guard tower and walked over and sat down next to Daryl without saying a word. Daryl didn't acknowledge Rick and never averted his gaze from the prison fields. After a few minutes Rick finally broke the silence. 

"It wasn't our fault we went the wrong way on the run you know. We had no way of knowing there wouldn't be much out there in that direction."

"I know that!" Daryl scoffed. "What do you think I'm stupid?"

"Not at all Daryl." Rick said. "It was bothering me until recently. Like I had let everyone down."

Daryl didn't reply. They sat there in silence again for a few more minutes.

"I think trust is important." Rick finally said breaking the silence again. "I trust you with my life and I hope you know you can trust me with yours. I know you probably haven't had many people in your life that you can trust but I want you to know you can trust me."

Daryl didn't say anything at first and eventually grumbled out a soft "I trust you."

"I haven't ever been with a guy before..." Rick continued. "but I had thought about it since my teen years. Marrying Lori when we were so young meant I couldn't ever explore that side of myself. Then after the world first went to shit I met you and thought about you a lot even before Lori died when her and I weren't in the best place. Now I think about you all the time and I can't stop. If you don't feel the same way about me I understand but I also trust that you won't resent me for feeling that way or for what happened in that shack."

Daryl didn't say anything or look at Rick but Rick could see that the expression on Daryl's face had changed and then he saw the moonlight catch and illuminate a single tear that ran down Daryl's cheek. Daryl wasn't wiping it away either. 

"It works both ways." Rick decided to speak again after Daryl's continued refusal to respond. "If you ever had anything you wanted to say to me I trust that you would speak up." 

"I ain't..." Daryl spoke softly and trailed off. "I'm not too good at this sharing your feelings thing."

"That's okay. I trust that you'll do it anyway." Rick said not letting Daryl off the hook. It was now or never and Rick knew if he let Daryl off the hook tonight he might never be able to reach him again.

"My Dad would've killed me if he had known...literally killed me." Daryl said. "I think Merle knew. He used to bring some nasty bar skanks home and sometimes he'd try to get me to fuck em. It never really worked out an eventually he stopped tryin. He called me names some but that's just the way he was. I think he accepted it."

Daryl looked at Rick for the first time during their conversation tonight. There were tears in his eyes. 

"So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm...gay and I ain't ever had sex with anyone before." Daryl said looking like he was about to break into a million pieces right before Rick's eyes. The tears had started flowing freely now but Daryl wasn't trying to hide them or look away.

Rick looked at Daryl and brushed the hair out of his face and gently wiped the tears from his face and then leaned in to kiss Daryl. Daryl's lips were solidly locked in place but with Rick's gentle persistence Daryl parted them and let Rick's tongue into his mouth to explore. Rick felt Daryl's hand grab his hardening member through his jeans.

"Little impatient?" Rick asked breaking the kiss.

"I've been waiting my whole life for this." Daryl responded with a light smile.

"I guess that's true." Rick said with a chuckle. "But you're supposed to be keeping watch."

"There ain't any living people stupid enough to come out at night anymore and there has barely been any dead freaks around the fences lately. Sides when Glenn and Maggie take over my shift tonight do you really think they're gonna be watching out there?" Daryl asked.

"No. I doubt it." Rick said with a smile.

"Well alright then." Daryl said as he pulled Rick in for another kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed chapter 2. Please leave comments. It let's me know I'm doing a good job. Chapter 3...the smut filled chapter that takes place immediately after chapter 2 probably won't be up for another week or so. 
> 
> I know I said this would probably end up a 4 chapter work but now I'm leaning towards 6 chapters because I have some more stuff I want to explore. Chapter 4 would be a condensed retelling of the first 3 chapters from Daryl's POV and Chapter 5 and 6 would also be told from Daryl's perspective with 5 being about the groups reaction to finding out about Rick and Daryl and Daryl dealing with it and chapter 6 being smut again but this time more tender smut. LOL


	3. Lust

As they explored each others mouths Rick felt Daryl's hands again this time undoing his belt and then unbuttoning and unzipping his pants. The moment that was achieved Daryl broke the kiss and immediately dropped to his knees and pulled down Rick's underwear.

"Holy shit!" Daryl exclaimed looking at Rick's impressive looking hard member. "Fuckin' huge!"

Rick smiled seeing the expression on Daryl's face. Daryl immediately started sucking and Rick felt teeth at first but Daryl quickly got the hang of it and Rick never felt his teeth again and soon enough Rick Grimes was getting the best blowjob he had ever had. Daryl was really good at this and soon enough was even better as Daryl started playing with Rick's balls with his right hand and Daryl's left hand wrapped around and clung to Rick's ass cheek.

Then Daryl had decided to try and deep throat Rick's big cock and took it all the way in which made him gag and after he finally pulled back gobs of drool dripped off Rick's shaft and fell to the ground. Daryl then began to find a rhythm with deep throating and was able to fully envelop the entire length of Rick's cock without gagging if he drew back in time.

Rick felt himself nearing orgasm much sooner than he wanted and had to stop Daryl. He cupped Daryl's head with both his hands and as Daryl drew back on a down stroke Rick gently coaxed his head back off.

"I'm gonna cum way too quick if you keep that up." Rick said smiling down at Daryl. Daryl then grabbed Rick's cock and lifted and pressed it up against Rick's stomach and then sucked Rick's left nut into his mouth followed by the right one. It felt like heaven as Daryl juggled Rick's balls in his mouth with his tongue. 

Daryl who was still fully dressed stood up and kissed Rick again and Rick started undoing Daryl's pants when Daryl drew back and then quickly undressed himself. Why wouldn't Daryl let Rick undress him he wondered but now Daryl was fully naked as well. 

"My turn" Rick announced looking down at Daryl's rock hard cock.

"Naw." Daryl said. "Just fuck me."

"You want me to fuck you?" Rick questioned. Rick hadn't anticipated Daryl would want to be fucked so he was a little surprised.

"That's what I just said." Daryl said sounding slightly annoyed.

"I don't want to hurt you." Rick said.

"You won't." Daryl said and went over to Glenn and Maggie's pile of blankets and the ground and flipped them over and then laid down on his back on top of them. "I've put stuff up there before." Daryl continued offering no further explanation.

"But you're on you back." Rick said feeling kind of stupid.

"Yeah and my legs will go over your shoulders. I've seen videos." Daryl announced. "I wanna look at you while you fuck me."

Rick moved and knelt down between Daryl's legs and then leaned over Daryl pressing his cock against Daryl's and leaned in for another kiss but was stopped by Daryl's hands pushing him back.

"You gonna fuck me or what?" Daryl said. 

"Okay." Rick said not sure what exactly to do next. Did he just push it in or what?

Daryl grabbed Rick's hand and drew it to his mouth and then sucked on the index and middle finger while looking at Rick directly in the eyes.  
"Stick those in there first." Daryl said after taking Rick's fingers out of his mouth.

Rick moved his fingers down the Daryl's tight entrance and as gently as he could inserted them hearing a slight moan from Daryl.

"Play with your fingers a little. Stretch me out." Daryl said. 

Rick opened his fingers slightly hearing Daryl moan some more. He closed them and twisted his fingers to a different position and then opened them again looking at Daryl's face who wasn't looking back. Daryl's eyes were closed and it looked as though he was deep in thought. All of a sudden Daryl's eyes opened.

"Okay. Fuck me now." Daryl said. 

Rick withdrew his fingers and put the head of his cock at Daryl's hole. 

"Spit on your dick an get it slippery." Daryl said. 

Rick spat in his hand a few times and then rubbed it on his cock as Daryl then lifted his legs up over Rick's shoulders. Rick then looked at Daryl's face hoping for some more guidance.

"Push it in." Daryl said.

Rick as gently as he could did just that and instantly heard a loud groan from Daryl and he was only about a third of the way in. Rick paused.

"You okay?" Rick asked.

"In!" Daryl demanded.

Rick slowly slid all all the way in hearing Daryl gasp and cry out as if in pain.

"Daryl are you sure you're okay?" Rick asked again.

"I'm fine. Just go slow at first." Daryl said opening his eyes and looking at Rick. 

Rick leaned in further and kissed Daryl as he slowly pushed in and pulled out of him. Daryl made soft moans into Rick's mouth but they sounded more pleasurable now and not painful like when Rick first pushed in. 

Rick then felt Daryl's hand move in between their bodies as Daryl started stroking his own cock. Rick pushed Daryl's hand off and replaced it with his own breaking the kiss so he could fuck Daryl and stroke his dick at the same time.

"Harder. Faster." Daryl groaned looking up at Rick. 

Rick obeyed as he felt Daryl's cock already leaking pre-cum onto his hand. Rick increased his thrusting and Daryl's moans got louder and more urgent and then there was a sharp gasp from Daryl.

"Right there." Daryl pleaded. "Faster....fuck me hard."

Rick sped up his thrusts and intensity aiming for that spot that was now making Daryl go wild. Daryl was moaning incredibly loud and his eyes were rolling back. Rick felt Daryl's fingernails painfully rake down his back.

"Oh fuck! Oh fuck! Oh Fuck!" Daryl cried out as he came all over his own chest, neck, and chin. 

Rick removed his hand from Daryl's cock and leaned back down into Daryl. He felt the slippery warmth of Daryl's cum between their chests. He couldn't kiss Daryl because Daryl was still moaning way to loud and spastically that it would have been impossible. 

Rick continued thrusting away aiming at that spot Daryl liked. Rick himself feeling close now as he licked Daryl's cum off of his neck and listened to Daryl's wild moans.

"I'm close." Rick announced moaning.

"On my face!" Daryl exclaimed. "Please Rick!"

Rick pulled out of Daryl and Daryl quickly brought his legs down off of Rick's shoulders. Rick then moved in closer straddling Daryl's torso as Daryl grabbed Rick's cock and leaned in looking up at Rick.

Rick felt himself cumming as he saw the first few thick white ribbons hit not Daryl's face but instead his hair. Daryl then put his mouth on the head of Rick's cock and the rest of Rick's orgasm was spent in Daryl's mouth and Daryl swallowed it and then pulled off.

"I said on my face!" Daryl said loudly and then smiled.

"You were the one aiming my dick!" Rick exclaimed chuckling."It's your fault."

"Yeah...I guess." Daryl said laughing and running his fingers through his cum coated bangs to the side slicking them to his forehead. Daryl then took his semen covered fingers and wiped them off on the edge of the blanket.

"Keep it classy." Rick said laughing as he grabbed his T-shirt and wiped Daryl's cum off of his chest and then tossed the shirt at Daryl for Daryl to wipe the rest of himself off the same way.

Daryl leaned in for another kiss and then pulled Rick down onto the pile of blankets.

"Cuddle with me." Daryl said. rolling over onto his side.

"We can't go to sleep." Rick said.

"I know." Daryl said back.

Rick rolled over on his side and wrapped his arm around Daryl.

"So how was your first time?" Rick asked. "You were pretty demanding about..."

"We can talk about it later." Daryl said cutting Rick off. "Right now I just want to cuddle."

Well that figures Rick thought. Daryl never wanted to talk about anything and now he was being just as controlling as he had been during the sex. It had been really good sex but Rick was bothered by the fact that Daryl hadn't let Rick undress him or blow him and there had really been nothing tender about the whole experience. Was that the way sex always was between two men Rick wondered or was this just some new barrier with Daryl?

Daryl started lightly snoring. Rick rolled his eyes. He would have to stay awake himself so they were not discovered by Maggie and Glenn when their shift came.

Maybe Daryl had been weird about the undressing because of the scars on his back Rick thought. No. That couldn't be it. Daryl had to have known that everyone had glimpsed his scars by now and Daryl wasn't hiding them from Rick now as he laid shirtless with his back to Rick. The blowjob thing was really weird though Rick thought. Maybe Daryl was just so excited to finally lose his virginity that he was worried he would cum too fast if Rick blew him? 

Still the thing that bothered Rick the most was that there was nothing tender about the sex. Did Daryl just see Rick as a way to get laid? No. That couldn't be it because Daryl had been adamant about cuddling after and that was definitely tender. It felt so good to cuddle with Daryl this time when it wasn't just about comforting a hurting Daryl like at the shack. Rick let the rhythm of his breathing match the rhythm of Daryl's and before he could think anymore sleep caught a hold of him against his will.

Rick woke up and it took him a second to gather his bearings and figure out what was going on. That had been close call. Rick got up to check the wind up clock and find out what time it was when he faintly heard Maggie giggle and then heard foot steps climbing the tower. 

"Shit!" Rick said quietly to himself and ran over to Daryl and shook him. "Get up now! Maggie and Glenn are on their way up!"

"Oh Fuck!" Daryl said instantly jumping up off the blankets.

They had both just gotten their underwear on when Glenn and Maggie walked in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I know I originally claimed the smut would probably be the easiest chapter for me to write. I was totally wrong! It was way harder for me to write this then the first 2 chapters and I almost gave up. I hope I did a decent job. As always comments are appreciated.
> 
> Chapter 4 shouldn't take me as long as chapter 3 did so hopefully I will have that up in a few days.


	4. Viewpoint

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A retelling of the first 3 chapters from Daryl's perspective where we learn what's been going through his head this whole time.

Daryl couldn't fall asleep in this old shack he and Rick had found just as daylight had been running out. The supply run had gone horribly wrong and Daryl felt like the whole thing was his fault. Rick had agreed when Daryl had suggested they go west but still the whole thing had been Daryl's idea in the first place and now he felt guilty as fuck.

Daryl felt like he had let everyone down but worst of all Rick. When they had to turn around or risk running out of gas Rick hadn't said much of anything to Daryl on the drive back which made Daryl feel like Rick was secretly blaming him. It really hurt that the person Daryl strived to please the most was now disappointed in him.

Worse yet was the damn fag feelings Daryl had for Rick and had been feeling ever since he met him. Daryl had hated that he only was attracted to guys and had long ago sworn to himself that he would just never have sex and would be a loner. The apocalypse and meeting Rick had forced Daryl to develop feelings he had always been able to push aside before.

The fact that Rick was a straight police officer with two kids only made matters worse because there was no chance of Daryl finding happiness with Rick. Still Daryl tried his best to ignore his attraction and just be friends with Rick but now he had really let Rick down. He had let everyone down.

Daryl felt his heart sink and the tears coming on. He was about to cry like a little fucking girl wasn't he? The tears started flowing and Daryl couldn't stop them. He did his best to be quiet with the whole thing because the last thing he wanted was for Rick to wake up and hear him crying like the little fucking faggot he was.

All of a sudden Daryl heard Rick waking up and that was enough to put an end to his bullshit crying. Daryl laid perfectly still as he heard Rick get up and unzip one of the bags. Probably thirsty Daryl thought. Daryl just realized himself that he was parched too but he didn't dare move...not now. He heard Rick walk back and then heard something hit the mattress but he didn't dare look. Then he felt the covers lift and Rick climbing in. What the fuck was going on?

Daryl turned around and looked at Rick. 

"What are you doing?" Daryl asked hoping his tear tracked face wasn't visible enough for Rick to see.

"The couch smell smells like cat piss." Rick answered.

"Fine, I'll sleep there and you can take the damn mattress." Daryl said annoyed as he started to get up.

"Can we just both sleep here Daryl? To be honest it's not just the smell but I'm lonely and it would just feel better being next to someone."

What the fuck was this? Why did Rick want to sleep next to him? Rick sure as hell wasn't a fag so what was this all about?

"Pfft! Whatever." Daryl said highly annoyed and rolled back over away from Rick.

Why was Rick doing this? Was he that angry with Daryl over the bad run that he was going to play some fucking trick on him to humiliate him? I guess I deserve it anyway Daryl thought to himself. If Rick's idea for revenge was humiliation well then Daryl was going to take it in hopes that Rick would then forgive Daryl after.

Daryl felt Rick's hand brush up against his back which made him tense up. Here comes the humiliation Daryl thought but then nothing else happened. Maybe Rick was already sleeping again and had did it in his sleep Daryl thought as he let himself calm down a little bit.

Rick then rolled over and wrapped his arm around Daryl and spooned up against him making Daryl dread what was about to happen next. Except...nothing else happened. Rick never said a word and didn't try to do anything else. But Rick wasn't a fag so what was this? It didn't matter anymore because Daryl had Risk's arm wrapped around him and his body pressed up against him and he could feel Rick's warm exhales on the back of his neck. This all felt so wonderful even though Daryl was sure something was fishy about it all. But it didn't matter now because comfort enveloped Daryl and he now felt the tiredness dragging him under.

Daryl woke up to sunlight streaming in from the high window of the shack. Rick was still asleep and still was spooning Daryl and Daryl carefully climbed out from Rick's arm and the covers not wanting to wake Rick up. The last thing Daryl needed was for Rick to wake up and and be instantly reminded of new ways to resent him.

After Rick woke up to the sound of Daryl taking the nailed board off the door they were on their way back to the prison a few minutes later.  
It was an uncomfortable ride on the way back because Rick wasn't saying anything to Daryl. For whatever reason Rick had decided to cuddle with Daryl was now a hindrance between them and Daryl knew Rick resented him for it on top of Daryl's idea to go west.

Right before they got back to the prison Rick finally spoke up.

"Daryl. Thanks for letting me snuggle up with you last night."

That's all you have to say huh? Daryl thought. Wow! Rick was clearly only doing this so Daryl didn't blow up in front of the entire group but Daryl knew the resentment was there.

"Yeah." was all Daryl was finally able to muster and then he started biting his thumbnail as the car passed through the prison gates.

~~~~~

The next two weeks had been a shitty nightmare for Daryl. Rick wasn't talking to Daryl at all which made Daryl feel like he couldn't even hang out with Rick anymore. It also seemed like everyone else was looking at him differently. 

Had Rick told everyone? Probably not Daryl thought. Rick might not have been out to humiliate Daryl like Daryl had originally thought but still it was obvious Rick had regrets about the whole thing. Maybe Rick had just been so lonely after Lori dying that he had tried to fight off the loneliness with Daryl? It didn't matter because no matter what Rick couldn't look at Daryl as a trusted sidekick anymore which really fucking hurt.

Daryl had done his best to avoid anyone and any conversation and spent most of his days hunting and trapping. At least he could be of some fucking use this way and didn't have to have the shame of the entire group thrust on him at all times.

The worst of it came two weeks to the day after the bad run when Carol had decided to confront Daryl in his cell before dinner.

"Daryl, I'm worried about you." Carol said. "You have been avoiding everyone since you and Rick got back from that run."

"Ain't your place to worry about my life." Daryl said not liking that Carol was confronting him.

"Actually it is." Carol replied. "You're my family and what happens to my family concerns me."

"I ain't your family!" Daryl snarled. "In case you haven't been paying attention your family is dead and so is mine!"

"You are my family though Daryl." Carol said. "I know you don't see me the way that I used to see you but that doesn't mean we aren't family. And maybe Rick doesn't see you the way that you see him but that doesn't mean you're not his family either."

Daryl now felt his rage boiling over.

"Just because I don't want you doesn't make me a faggot you fucking bitch! Get the fuck out! Now!"

Daryl saw tears filling Carol's eyes.

"Alright Daryl. But you are my family." she said as she turned around and left Daryl's cell.

Daryl instantly broke down after Carol left his cell. Had he really just talked to her like that again? It had been bad enough the way he talked to Carol when Sophia had been missing but this was even worse. Carol had probably been the nicest most caring person Daryl had ever met and this is how he paid her back. Carol obviously knew Daryl's secret and she wasn't at all judgmental about it and he treated her like shit in return. Daryl knew deep down that he was trash and this just proved it. 

What the fuck was he still doing here? Rick and Carol would certainly be better off without him and so would the rest of the group. Daryl didn't need to group to survive. He was sure he could survive on his own without help and the group would be able to function together better without him around.

Daryl skipped dinner that night because he felt sick to his stomach. When he was making his way to the guard tower he had already made up his mind. He was going to leave tonight after his shift. He would quietly sneak out right after Maggie and Glenn took over on their shift. They would be having sex anyway so they wouldn't notice him leave and then he wouldn't have to announce it to everyone. The entire group didn't need his bullshit and it would just be better if he slipped out as quietly as possible.

Daryl had barely gotten to starting his shift when Rick came in and sat down next to him. Fuck! What was he doing there? He wasn't even saying anything. Daryl had begun contemplating just getting up and leaving right then and there when Rick finally spoke.

"It wasn't our fault we went the wrong way on the run you know. We had no way of knowing there wouldn't be much out there in that direction."

"I know that!" Daryl scoffed. "What do you think I'm stupid?"

"Not at all Daryl." Rick said. "It was bothering me until recently. Like I had let everyone down."

So Rick didn't blame him for the bad run? Didn't matter much at this point. Daryl had fucked everything else up anyway. He was still going to leave after Rick left him alone.

"I think trust is important." Rick finally said breaking the silence again. "I trust you with my life and I hope you know you can trust me with yours. I know you probably haven't had many people in your life that you can trust but I want you to know you can trust me."

What the fuck was this all about? Did Rick want him to admit he was a fag? Why? What did it matter to Rick anymore after he had avoided Daryl the past two fucking weeks. What was all this shit about trust? Daryl had been wrong. Rick hadn't blamed Daryl for anything and hadn't been out to humiliate Daryl like Daryl had thought would happen. Fine then. That was trustworthy and if Rick wanted to hear Daryl say it back well then okay. At least Rick wouldn't completely hate Daryl after he left then.

"I trust you." Daryl said very softly.

"I haven't ever been with a guy before..." Rick said. "but I had thought about it since my teen years. Marrying Lori when we were so young meant I couldn't ever explore that side of myself. Then after the world first went to shit I met you and thought about you a lot even before Lori died when her and I weren't in the best place. Now I think about you all the time and I can't stop. If you don't feel the same way about me I understand but I also trust that you won't resent me for feeling that way or for what happened in that shack."

Had Rick actually felt the same way this entire time and been just as awkward about the whole thing as Daryl had been? Daryl felt himself starting to break down again and felt tears running down his face.

"It works both ways." Rick said. "If you ever had anything you wanted to say to me I trust that you would speak up."

It was now clear that Rick expected Daryl to reveal himself.

"I ain't..." a fag is was Daryl had almost said before he stopped himself. That was a lie. Daryl needed to man up and tell the truth to Rick. Rick seemed to know the truth already anyway just like Carol had.

"I'm not too good at this sharing your feelings thing." is what eventually came out of Daryl's mouth instead still too fucking scared to say the truth aloud.

"That's okay. I trust that you'll do it anyway." Rick said.

Fuck. Rick was really going to make Daryl say it wasn't he? There wasn't anymore hiding left to do.

"My Dad would've killed me if he had known...literally killed me." Daryl said. "I think Merle knew. He used to bring some nasty bar skanks home and sometimes he'd try to get me to fuck em. It never really worked out an eventually he stopped tryin. He called me names some but that's just the way he was. I think he accepted it."

Daryl looked at Rick for the first time during their conversation tonight. He felt the tears flowing freely.

"So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm...gay and I ain't ever had sex with anyone before." Daryl said feeling like he was about to break into a million pieces right before Rick's eyes.

Rick brushed the hair out of Daryl's face and then gently wiped the tears from his face and then leaned in to kiss him. Daryl's lips were solidly locked in place because this all felt so weird but with Rick's gentle persistence Daryl parted his lips and let Rick's tongue into his mouth to explore. Daryl then felt desire take over completely and reached over and grabbed Rick's cock through his pants.

"Little impatient?" Rick asked breaking the kiss.

"I've been waiting my whole life for this." Daryl responded with a light smile.

"I guess that's true." Rick said with a chuckle. "But you're supposed to be keeping watch."

"There ain't any living people stupid enough to come out at night anymore and there has barely been any dead freaks around the fences lately. Besides when Glenn and Maggie take over my shift tonight do you really think they will be watching out there?" Daryl said.

"No. I doubt it." Rick said with a smile.

"Well alright then." Daryl said as he pulled Rick in for another kiss.

~~~~~

They were kissing. This felt so fucking magical to Daryl. He had avoided this his whole life but it now felt more right than anything ever had before. Daryl reached down and undid Rick's belt and pants. Then he broke the kiss and dropped to his knees and pulled down Rick's pants and underwear to revel at the sight of Rick's massive hard cock. That fucker that had to be ten inches at least Daryl thought.

"Holy shit! Fuckin' huge!" Daryl said looking up at Rick and seeing him smile.

Daryl immediately started sucking. It felt weird at first and Daryl had been sure he was doing a bad job. He knew his teeth were grazing Rick's cock and that he needed to relax his jaw more. After that he heard Rick moan and he knew he was doing a better job and felt the need to take all of Rick into himself.

Daryl gagged as he took Rick all the way in. He tried his best to adjust to it because he knew from Rick's moans that Rick liked it but Daryl felt like he was going to throw up and eased back and globs of saliva dripped to the ground. Daryl tried again hearing Rick's moans and now did so in a comfortable rhythm of pulling back in time before his gag reflex was set off. 

All of a sudden Daryl felt Rick's hand on his head gently coaxing him off his cock.

"I'm gonna cum way too quick if you keep that up." Rick said smiling down at Daryl. 

Daryl then grabbed Rick's cock and lifted and pressed it up against Rick's stomach and then sucked Rick's left nut into his mouth followed by the right one. Daryl didn't like this as much as sucking Rick's massive cock and quickly finished and stood up and kissed Rick again.  
Daryl felt Rick's hands undoing his pants and Daryl quickly pulled away. He knew Rick had seen his scars before and so had the rest of the group but it just felt somehow wrong letting Rick undress him. Daryl quickly undressed himself feeling awkward.

"My turn." Rick announced looking down at Daryl's rock hard cock.

Daryl didn't know how he felt about this. His cock was good sized but nothing compared to Rick's monster and he felt inadequate.

"Naw. Just fuck me." Daryl said deciding Rick would probably like that just as much and it wouldn't be as awkward for Daryl.

"You want me to fuck you?" Rick asked raising a brow.

"That's what I just said." Daryl replied feeling a tad frustrated with himself.

"I don't want to hurt you." Rick said.

"You won't." Daryl replied as he went over to Glenn and Maggie's pile of blankets and the ground and flipped them over and then laid down on his back on top of them. "I've put stuff up there before."

Daryl had inserted various objects up himself during his teen years and when he had finally turned 18 had went to a sex shop to buy a dildo but instead had shoplifted one as well as gay porn videos because all of it was way too expensive for him to buy and because he would have been to embarrassed to buy gay stuff anyway.

"But you're on you back." Rick said looking at Daryl puzzled.

"Yeah and my legs will go over your shoulders. I've seen videos." Daryl said. "I wanna look at you while you fuck me."

Rick moved in and knelt down between Daryl's legs and then leaned over to kiss Daryl again. Daryl stopped him not having any more patience at this point.

"You gonna fuck me or what?" Daryl asked.

"Okay." Rick said looking perplexed. 

Daryl grabbed Rick's hand and drew it to his mouth and then sucked on the index and middle finger while looking at Rick directly in the eyes.  
"Stick those in there first." Daryl said after taking Rick's fingers out of his mouth.

Daryl moaned and he felt Rick's fingers enter him.

"Play with your fingers a little. Stretch me out." Daryl said.

Daryl felt Risk's fingers moving and gently scissoring open and closed inside of him.

"Okay. Fuck me now." Daryl said after awhile now feeling ready.

Rick withdrew his fingers and put the head of his cock at Daryl's hole.

"Spit on your dick an get it slippery." Daryl said.

Rick spat in his hand a few times and then rubbed it on his cock as Daryl then lifted his legs up over Rick's shoulders. Daryl then saw Rick's unsure expression looking for more guidance.

"Push it in." Daryl said.

Rick did and it hurt. The dildo Daryl had used on himself plenty of times in the past wasn't as big as Rick was.

"You okay?" Rick asked.

"In!" Daryl said knowing it would only hurt for a little bit.

Rick pushed all the way in and Daryl cried out. Fuck this hurt and why didn't they have lube dammit? It was okay though because it would all feel good soon. Daryl was sure of it.

"Daryl are you sure you're okay?" Rick asked again.

"I'm fine. Just go slow at first." Daryl said.

Rick leaned in further and kissed Daryl as he slowly pushed in and pulled out of him. This pain was now easing into a dull sensation as a new sensation of pleasure was now building.

Daryl reached in between their bodies to grab his own cock and Rick broke the kiss leaning back a little bit and removed Daryl's hand and replaced it with his own. Rick was now stroking Daryl's cock and fucking Daryl at the same time and everything was beginning to feel perfectly wonderful. 

"Harder. Faster." Daryl pleaded looking into Rick's gorgeous blue eyes.

Daryl felt Rick do just that and soon enough...oh man! Rick was hitting that spot! Fuck!

"Right there." Daryl pleaded. "Faster....fuck me hard."

And Daryl felt Rick continue hitting that spot and holy shit! Daryl knew he was making incredibly loud noises but he couldn't stop.

"Oh fuck! Oh fuck! Oh Fuck!" Daryl cried out as he came all over his own chest, neck, and chin.

Daryl felt Rick lean back down into Daryl and it seemed that Rick wanted to kiss him but he couldn't because Rick had never stopped hitting that spot with his thrusts and Daryl couldn't stop his loud and animalistic spasms. Daryl felt Rick's tongue licking the cum off of his neck as he heard Rick's quiet groans grow louder.

"I'm close." Rick announced through his increasing moans.

"On my face. Please Rick!" Daryl managed to plead.

Rick pulled out of Daryl and Daryl quickly brought his legs down off of Rick's shoulders. Rick then moved in closer straddling Daryl's torso as Daryl grabbed Rick's cock and leaned in looking up at Rick.

Daryl saw the first few squirts of cum shoot out of Rick's cock and felt them his land in his hair. Daryl then put his mouth on the head of Rick's cock and the rest of Rick's orgasm was spent in Daryl's mouth and Daryl swallowed it and then pulled off.

"I said on my face!" Daryl said loudly and then smiled.

"You were the one aiming my dick!" Rick exclaimed chuckling."It's your fault."

"Yeah...I guess." Daryl said laughing and running his fingers through his cum coated bangs to the side slicking them to his forehead. Daryl then took his semen covered fingers and wiped them off on the edge of the blanket.

"Keep it classy." Rick said laughing as he grabbed his T-shirt and wiped Daryl's cum off of his chest and then tossed the shirt at Daryl for Daryl to wipe the rest of himself off the same way.

Daryl leaned in for another kiss and then pulled Rick down onto the pile of blankets.

"Cuddle with me." Daryl said. rolling over onto his side.

"We can't go to sleep." Rick said.

"I know." Daryl said back.

Rick rolled over on his side and wrapped his arm around Daryl.

"So how was your first time?" Rick asked. "You were pretty demanding about..."

"We can talk about it later." Daryl said cutting Rick off. "Right now I just want to cuddle."

Daryl hadn't wanted to explain himself to Rick right now. It had been so wonderful and right now he just wanted to cherish this moment in Rick's arms.

Daryl couldn't help but think that just a half an hour earlier he had been planning to leave the group and the prison and now there was nowhere else he would rather be. He would have to find a way to make things work now. For starters he would have to apologize to Carol. 

Rick's body was giving him warmth and complete comfort. It hadn't been long before Daryl was asleep.

Daryl woke up to Rick shaking him vigorously.

"Get up now! Maggie and Glenn are on their way up!"

"Oh Fuck!" Daryl said instantly jumping up off the blankets.

They had both just gotten their underwear on when Glenn and Maggie walked in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it. Comments appreciated.


	5. Weightlessness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Daryl deals with the rest of the group finding out. Maybe he is better off then he thought possible.

"Um. Hey guys. What's going on?" Glenn asked with a smug grin on his face. 

Maggie just stood there with her mouth gaping in astonishment. Daryl had no idea what to say so he continued to get dressed and hoped Rick would answer for the both of them.

"Checking eachother for ticks. I found one on me earlier." Rick said not very convincingly as he was laughing a little bit while he said it.

"Oh yeah?" Glenn said laughing. 

"You guys checked eachother for ticks on our blankets huh?" Maggie asked also now laughing.

"Flipped your blankets over first." Daryl said not laughing like everyone else.

"We already flipped those blankets over once." Glenn said with a big grin on his face. "Guess we can let you guys finish getting dressed while we go grab some new blankets real quick."

Glenn turned to leave but stopped when Maggie spoke again.

"Your hair gel is interesting Daryl. Did you borrow it from Cameron Diaz?" she asked laughing out loud as Rick and Glenn joined in the giggling.

"What the fuck does that mean?" Daryl asked getting angry that he was being laughed at and had no idea why.

"It's from the movie There's Something About Mary." Rick said putting his hand on Daryl's shoulder. "Cameron Diaz's character puts cum in her hair mistaking it for hair gel."

Daryl felt himself turning bright red with embarrassment.

"You still got a little of me in your hair." Rick said smiling and then leaned in and gave Daryl a kiss on the cheek.

"Whatever." was all Daryl could say as he got out of there as quickly as possible.

"Daryl! It was just a joke. We still all love you." He heard Maggie call out as he was marching down the tower steps. 

Fuck! That had been really embarrassing but only because Rick and Daryl had been literally caught with their pants down and Daryl had cum in his hair. Glenn and Maggie hadn't seemed to give a shit about him and Rick being together and Rick had even kissed him on the cheek in front of them. 

Maybe things weren't so bad after all. Maybe Daryl could learn to actually open up to these people rather than hide from them. He passed by a bucket used for watering the garden that had a little water left in it and he used it to rinse the dried cum out of his hair and then went inside to his cell and laid down.

Two minutes later and he heard footsteps approaching. He knew it was Rick. 

"It's okay you know." Rick said quietly walking into Daryl's cell. "Nobody is gonna give a shit. Maggie and Glenn don't care." Rick sat down on the edge of Daryl's cell bed.

"Move over." Rick said lightly pushing Daryl.

"Bed's not big enough for the both of us." Daryl said.

"Bullshit!" Rick said forcibly moving Daryl over onto his side. Rick climbed in and wrapped his arm around Daryl. It was tight but there was indeed enough room for the both of them.

"You're mine Daryl. I'm tired of your bullshit. I'm gonna break you down."

"Fuck you." Daryl said feeling trapped even though he knew that is exactly how Rick wanted him to feel.

"No. Fuck you Daryl. No wait...I already did that." Rick said with a small chuckle. 

"Whataya want from me?" Daryl asked feeling helpless and hopeful at the same time.

"I want you Daryl." Rick said kissing Daryl's neck. "I want to kiss you. I want to suck you. I want to be inside of you...like a part of you. I want to cuddle with you. I want you to stop being so scared of me. I want you to tell me what you're thinking. I want you to stop shutting me out. I want to make love to you...not just fuck you. I want you to be as happy as it is possible to be in this shithole world we live in."

There was a pause.

"What is it that you want from me Daryl?"

Daryl didn't know how answer the question. Aside from the embarrassment from Maggie and Glenn this felt like exactly what Daryl had wanted even though he had tried to avoid it for so long.

"I wanna know things are gonna be okay. You're in my cell holdin me hostage and I wanna know Carl isn't gonna blame me for it all when he finds out. I wanna know that this is real."

"It's real." Rick said squeezing Daryl tight. "Carl knows. He sorta forced me to tell him how I feel about you. He's okay with it. Carol knows too but she knew before I told her."

"Carl really knows and is fine with it?" Daryl asked softly.

"Yeah. He said that I deserve to be happy. He was surprised to learn that I go both ways but said he knew you were gay for me because you follow me around like a lost puppy trying to get me to adopt you."

"That little punk!" Daryl said trying to sound serious about it but knowing he failed.

"Aww." Rick gushed. " You're trying so hard to keep that wall up around you but it's coming down fast."

"Shut up." was all Daryl could think of to respond with.

~~~~~

Daryl woke up alone in his cell. He guessed from the position of the sunlight streaming into the prison that it was about noon. Daryl was hungry and it was lunchtime so he made his way to the cafeteria. 

The light banter of conversation halted when he walked in. Daryl sat down next to Rick and was handed a bowl of baked beans. Daryl fucking hated baked beans but Michonne, Glenn, and Maggie had found a lot of boxes filled with cans of baked beans on their run so he was going to have to get used to eating them.

Everyone ate in silence now and the tension was thick. Finally Sasha spoke up.

"So are you guys finally talking to eachother again?" She asked looking and Daryl and Rick.

"Sasha stop." Tyreese said.

"What?" she said rolling her eyes at Tyreese and then looking back at Daryl and Rick.

"Yeah. We are." Rick answered.

"Well that's good. It's about time." she said. "I didn't see you in your cell last night Rick. Have you even slept?"

"That's cause he was in Daryl's cell." Carl said. "They were playing meet the Flintstones and having a gay ole time together."

Daryl shot daggers with his eyes across the table at the little brat who just smiled in return. Daryl wanted to take his bowl of disgusting baked beans and put them to good use by dumping them on Carl's head.

Silence. Uncomfortable silence. Nobody was eating anymore and nobody knew what to say. Finally Rick started lightly laughing. "Gay ole time. That's a good one Carl."

"Thanks Dad." Carl said smiling and looking proud of himself.

"It's true though." Rick said now being serious. "Daryl and I are together and if anyone has a problem with it then you need to say something now so we can resolve it."

There were some "I don't care" mutters and people looking around at eachother before the group consciousness had shifted over to Hershel.

"I know why everyone is looking at me." Hershel announced. "Truth be told my stance on the issue changed years ago thanks to Beth here." He put his arm on her shoulder. "She showed me all kinds of documentation about homosexuality in animals and pointed out hypocrisies in the Bible. It took me awhile but I came around."

Maggie hugged Beth who was smiling shyly.

"It's not my place to judge." Hershel continued. "Rick as long as you and Daryl here are happy together then I don't have a problem."

"They are super happy together." Carl said making quotations with his fingers at the word happy.

"Alright Carl. Enough." Rick said chuckling.

Daryl picked a bean out of his bowl and flicked it across the table into Carl's face.

"What?!?!" Carl exclaimed looking at Daryl in astonishment while laughing. "You did NOT just do that to me!"

Carl scooped up a spoonful of beans from his bowl.

"NO!" Rick said sternly looking between both Carl and Daryl. "We are not going to do this. We need these beans to eat even if they are gross."

"Fine." Carl said dropping his spoon back into his bowl and then stared daggers back at Daryl.

Daryl just smiled back at Carl. Daryl knew this was the start of a huge war between him and Carl. A prank war. Daryl was going to win no matter what though. This little snot nosed punk had no fucking idea who he was up against.

Rick leaned over and gave Daryl a quick kiss on the cheek. Then everyone resumed to eating the disgusting baked beans and engaged in normal banter again like they had before Daryl had walked in.

~~~~~

Right after lunch Daryl saw Carol walking away from the cafeteria. She smiled at him and Daryl gave her a big hug.

"I'm so fucking sorry." Daryl said with tears filling his eyes.

"Good! You better be." Carol replied lightly shoving Daryl back.

"I'm such a fucking idiot." Daryl said now starting to lightly cry.

"No. You're not." Carol said. "We are very much alike Daryl. We didn't know how to be strong or even be normal in the old world but we are both now coming into our own in this new world we live in."

"I fucked up too many times with you." Daryl said. "I don't know how to make things right."

"I do!" Carol exclaimed with a big smile. "I'm done cooking. I'm just done with it! You are going to teach me how to snare and trap wild animals so I won't be expected to cook anymore."

Daryl knew Carol could do absolutely anything she set her mind to doing so she would be a perfect student.

"I'm going out now to check the snares if you want to come along and get your first lesson?"

"Of course." Carol said smiling lightly slapping Daryl's cheek.

~~~~~

Daryl and Carol didn't get back to the prison until dusk. Carol had been quite the student and ended up taking down a five point buck with Daryl's crossbow. It took them awhile to heft the animal back to the prison. 

Michonne saw them coming and cleared the walkers around the fence coming for them.

"Damn!" Michonne said with a grin. "We need to make this into some venison jerky right away before the meat goes bad."

"Have it it then." Carol said proudly while walking off. "My work is done."

Daryl laughed.

~~~~~

After Daryl and Michone found people to smoke the meat and make strips of venison jerky Daryl headed to his cell. It had been a great day. Crazy but great and Daryl wanted to lay down and reflect on it when Rick stopped him.

"Where do you think you're going lover?" Rick asked.

"I need to sleep." Daryl said smiling.

"Maybe in a hour I'll allow it." Rick said sternly. "Right now there is a problem in the boiler room and I need your help."

Daryl rolled his eyes and followed Rick to the boiler room. Why did bad shit always have to happen when he was having a good day he wondered to himself.

Rick opened the door to the boiler room and Daryl saw the the futon from the intake area of the prison. Daryl looked over at Rick.

"I don't want to fuck you this time Daryl. I want to make love to you." Rick said pulling Daryl in for a kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it. Please leave comments as I am starved for them.
> 
> One chapter left...smut mixed with LOVE.


	6. Love

Rick guided Daryl to the futon not breaking the kiss. Daryl knew he had to surrender completely this time. He knew Rick wanted him to and deep down he knew it was time. 

Rick broke the kiss and took Daryl's shirt off and then ran his hands gently down Daryl's back examining the scars with his fingers.

"You're going to tell me about these someday." Rick said with a trace of sadness in his eyes as he looked at Daryl. 

Daryl didn't want to say anything to that so he took Rick's shirt off. They were kissing again as they each fumbled at eachothers pants trying to get them open.

Daryl got Rick's open first and then tried going down to his knees to suck Rick but Rick stopped him.

"Not this time Daryl." Rick said smiling. "My turn."

Rick stepped out of his pants and finished getting Daryl's off and then gently coaxed Daryl to lay back on the futon. Daryl felt Rick's warm mouth engulf his cock.

It felt wonderful and scary at the same time. Daryl didn't know why but getting a blowjob made him feel very vulnerable. Daryl closed his eyes and just tried to concentrate on the sensation so his mind didn't get the better of him. He felt Rick spreading and lifting his legs and then Rick stopped sucking.

"Always wanted to try this." Rick said smiling.

"Try what? Suc..."

Daryl was cut short when he felt Rick's tongue licking his asshole.

"Holy shit!" Daryl cried out. He hadn't expected Rick to do this but the sensation he felt was insane. It tickled really bad and yet felt so good at the same time.

Daryl also now felt more exposed and vulnerable than when Rick had been blowing him. Between his racing mind and the physical sensations felt Daryl was going into sensory overload. Daryl couldn't control his mind anymore and felt like he needed to be in a straitjacket. He had thoughts racing through his mind about what his Father had did to him causing his scars, the repulsive tickling sensation he wanted to get away from, the enormous amount of physical pleasure his body felt, and the feeling of being exposed to Rick. It was all too much to take at once and Daryl needed to concentrate and narrow things down or he was going to go batshit insane.

"I...oh fuck!" Daryl said moaning.

"My Dad made those scars on my back." 

Daryl felt Rick stop licking but Rick didn't pull away. Oh Fuck! How long ago had Rick stopped? Had it been minutes or seconds? Daryl had no idea and wanted to curl up in a ball and hide away from the world when he felt Rick start up again.

Daryl tried to compartmentalize the sensations he felt. He was going to concentrate on the physical pleasure he felt while talking about the pain.

"He used to beat me for no reason." Daryl said moaning. "My Mom and Merle too. He did it cause he is a piece of shit and liked doing it. There was never a real reason. Sometimes he used a belt, sometimes he used only his hands, when he was real drunk and angry he used a butter knife cause it was dull and wouldn't kill me if he sliced me with it. He would drag it down my back as hard as he could while I screamed and he laughed. That's what most of the scars are from. I hope he is dead but I don't know. I hope if he is dead that he suffered real bad first." 

Daryl felt Rick stop again and then felt Rick's fingers entering him and stretching him open.

Rick stood up and picked a small tube off the ground. It was lube. Maybe it came from Michonne, Maggie, and Glenn's run Daryl guessed. 

Daryl looked at Rick squirting the lube onto his fingers. Rick's eyes were filled with tears and Daryl heard him lightly whimper as he felt Rick's fingers coating his hole with lube. Daryl felt Rick entering him and Rick wasn't being so timid this time about it. Rick slid all the way in as Daryl gasped.

"You're wrecking me Daryl." Rick said as tears flowed down his checks. Rick then grabbed Daryl's cock and jerked it as aggressively as he was thrusting into Daryl. Daryl felt a few tears fall from Rick's face onto his abdomen and chest.

Daryl felt Rick hitting that spot inside him again with full force thrusts. 

"I'm yours Daryl." Rick said though grunting moans as he thrusted hard. "You're mine and I'm yours. I'm your possession Daryl. I am fucking owned by you."

Daryl felt himself nearing orgasm and then Rick said "I love you Daryl Dixon." as he looked down at Daryl.

Daryl felt himself cumming as though he was not himself. He felt like he was a spirit just temporarily inhabiting his own body like it didn't belong to him. It was the complete opposite of what had been happening earlier. Everything was just white noise now.

Daryl felt Rick pull out of him and then Rick lick all the cum off his abdomen and chest. Rick then pushed back in hard and leaned down to Daryl's face as he thrusted hard.

"I'm yours right?" Rick asked with a pained expression on his face."Daryl am I yours?"

"Yes." Daryl finally managed to mutter. Rick was hitting that spot hard and it was hard to concentrate or talk.

Daryl felt Rick pull out again and then felt Rick's weight on top of him. Rick was kissing him and grinding his cock on Daryl's abdomen. 

Daryl felt the warm spurts of Risk's cum shoot between their bodies as Rick moaned loudly while still kissing Daryl.

They both laid there that way for an unknown amount of time. Finally Daryl rolled out from under Rick and onto his side hoping that Rick would spoon him again which Rick did.

"You really fucked with me Daryl." Rick said. "I have never had a problem performing before and you telling me that stuff about your Dad really messed with my head."

"Yeah well I almost went insane when you asked me about my scars right before doing that stuff to me." Daryl said lightly laughing. "Plus I don't think you should tell someone you love them like that during sex because they might think you only said it because the heat of the moment."

Daryl felt Rick forcibly roll him onto his back. Rick leaned over right into Daryl's face and the look in Rick's eyes was filled with concern.

"Do you think I say things like that all the time Daryl? I have only said it to one person before and I hope you are the last person I say it to. I love you Daryl! I meant it when I said it a few minutes ago and I mean it now. You NEED to understand that above all else."

How was this even possible Daryl wondered as he felt like he was going to cry yet again but this time for a reason unlike any before in his life. 

"I love you too." Daryl said as he felt tears running down his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is it for now. I hope you all enjoyed it.
> 
> Have a sequel planned but that is a few months away because I'm really busy right now.
> 
> The sequel will go away from canon and take place a year later with the group in a new location that is seemingly perfect in it's safety. Daryl and Rick are so happy together. But something or someone always has to fuck things up....maybe a guy named Negan from the comics.


End file.
